Mana Dissociation Read online

  I don’t remember much of the flight. I think I must have fallen asleep the moment we finished taking off. I remember feeling my stomach churn as the plane seemed to lurch upwards, and was forced down into my seat. I gripped the edge of my seat in panic as I glanced out the window and saw the ground dropping away from beneath me at an alarming rate. I flashed a glance at Aiden expecting him to equally unnerved, but he seemed to be perfectly calm. He was flicking through the inflight magazine with all outward appearances of being unconcerned by the fact that the ground was disappearing beneath us.

  That wasn’t fair. Wasn’t he the one with the phobia about flying? Why wasn’t he freaking out? Maybe I was wrong about that. Maybe it wasn’t a fear of flying. Okay, one fear struck from the list – several dozen to go.

  It wasn’t too long before the plane levelled out and my stomach settled back down. After the initial rush of the take-off, there really wasn’t much to do. I flipped through the magazines in front of me, but I must have dozed off as the next thing I remember was a loud buzzing noise. At first I thought it was my alarm clock, but it was quickly followed by a voice over the intercom telling me to prepare for landing. My alarm clock never did that! I blinked my eyes several times and attempted to wake myself up when I realized something horrible. In my sleep, I’d managed to lean over and my head was now firmly resting against Aiden’s shoulder. I immediately went red with embarrassment. I’d fallen asleep on my co-worker! I immediately straightened myself up and attempted to compose my thoughts. I hurriedly snuck a look at his shoulder. Dear God, please don’t tell me that I had drooled on his shirt in my sleep. I quickly blinked and was infinitely relieved to find that it appears that I hadn’t. That was good. I breathed a sigh of relief. I don’t think I could have lived that down.

  “Err…. sorry,” I mumbled, still unwilling to look him directly in his sunglasses.

  “It’s okay,” Aiden replied matter of factly, “You seemed pretty out of it.”

  “Yeah, I didn’t sleep last night.”

  “You stayed awake all night?” Aiden raised an eyebrow.

  “Yeah, kind of. The flight was so early.” I replied. It seemed really stupid now that I said it out loud.

  “Well, that explains why you fell asleep then,” He continued. He wasn’t saying it, but I could tell from his expression that he found the whole situation amusing.

  Our conversation was interrupted as the flight staff moved down the cabin to ensure that everyone was ready for landing. Funnily enough, I wasn’t as nervous during the landing, even though I could see the ground rising up to meet us at an incredibly fast rate. I was still so mortified about falling asleep on Aiden that I had no fear left for the landing.

  “Ladies and gentlemen,” the stewardess announced, “Welcome to Heathrow Airport.”

  * * * * * *

  I don’t think I’ll ever be able to get used to driving on the wrong side of the road. It’s a strange feeling - like the buildings are travelling the wrong way down the street as you pass them by. I was almost certain that, if I was driving, I’d have immediately careened onto the wrong side the road and into oncoming traffic causing untold property damage and destruction to everything around me.

  True to her word, Karen met us at the Airport to drive us back to the hotel. The traffic was horrendous, and after about fifteen minutes I had no idea how long we’d even travelled. All the roads seemed to blur into one another. We were heading into the main business district, and it seemed like forever before the taxi eventually pulled over and we were let out.

  Karen smiled politely at the driver and passed him over some funny looking notes. Oh, shit. I’d completely forgotten to change my currency into British pounds. I mentally cursed myself as I remember that Emily had explicitly advised me that this would be a good thing to do before I left. I’d need to talk to Karen about that. There had to be a bank or something where I could get some cash out.

  The hotel that work had booked us into was nice. Very nice. I really didn’t have any idea of what to expect from the hotel. In my mind I’d pictured anything from a back packers hostel through to a five-star hotel that you’d see in the movies. The reality was somewhere in the middle. Karen helped me check in, gave me my access card for the room and ushered me on my way. I was desperate to get into the room so that I could shower. My head had felt like it had been filled with cotton wool ever since I’d gotten off the plane and my stomach was making some unusual noises of complaint. I don’t think air travel agreed with me. Once I got up to my room I was amazed, I’d been given a suite. I had a separate bedroom and kitchenette. I even had a couch and TV. This wasn’t what I’d expected at all. I thought that it would be like hotel rooms back home. Just a long room with a bed in one corner, table and chairs and a kettle and sink in the other. This place was almost as big as my apartment. Yessiree, a girl could certainly get used to this.

  The shower was everything that I’d hoped it would be. About half way through washing my hair, my ears popped and the immediate relief was palpable. I hadn’t even known my ears were blocked, though in hindsight I should have probably expected it. I’d just finished getting changed into casual clothes when a knock at my door interrupted me. I hadn’t finished getting ready, but I tentatively opened the door and was greeted by Karen’s smiling face.

  “Just checking in,” Karen chirped, “I’ve arranged for dinner tonight at the restaurant in the hotel. Dinner’s at 7. Aiden’s in the room next door to you and I’m down the hall.”

  “Dinner?” I murmured confused. It couldn’t be dinner time yet could it? I mentally did the math in my head.

  “Yep, that’s in about an hour.” Karen confirmed with a grin, “There’s a four-hour time difference.”

  This floored me. I had no idea it was that late. It didn’t seem like it was that long ago that I’d boarded the plane back home. It was almost six o’clock now? Just how long was that flight that I’d slept through. I probably should have paid more attention.

  I promised that I’d check in with Karen once I was ready and go down to the restaurant with her. The moment I contemplated dinner my stomach started rumbling. Maybe that’s why I was feeling so odd. The fact that I hadn’t eaten in god knows how long. I’d just chalked it up to a bad reaction from the flight.

  The dinner reservation changed my plans completely. I’d planned on wearing a t-shirt and jeans, but that wouldn’t do for dinner. I hastily selected several different outfits before discarding them all and going back to the one that I’d selected first. About twenty minutes later I was knocking on Karen’s door, locked, loaded and ready to go.

  To my immediate relief Karen was dressed in a similar fashion to me. I’d had a horrible feeling that maybe I should have worn a cocktail dress or something, but thankfully neat and casual seemed to be the order of the day.

  “Aiden’s not coming,” Karen informed me, “Apparently he’s just going to get room service.”

  “They have room service?” I gushed, “Awesome!”

  Karen gave me a funny look and I immediately resolved to try to stop acting so naive and impressed with everything.

  “No,” I murmured, “He should join us. After all, we’re a team. I’m going to talk to him.”

  “I tried earlier,” Karen warned me, “But you’re welcome to try.”

  I took this as a challenge and flounced down the corridor, knocking loudly on his door. It took only a few seconds before he answered the door. He was still wearing those stupid sunglasses.

  “Sunglasses? Really dude?” I exclaimed. Who wears sunglasses in a hotel room.

  “I have sensitive eyes.” He replied meekly, almost apologetically and I immediately felt sorry for snapping at him.

  “Well, lose the sunglasses. We’re going to dinner.” I announced as I quickly looked him up and down. He was dressed appropriately for dinner.

  “Uh, I said was going to stay here.” He tried, but I cut him off.

  “Nope. Dinner. Now.” I continued unfazed by his
stammering attempts to get out of it.

  Eventually he relented and disappeared back into his apartment emerging a second or two later with his keycard and wallet. The sunglasses were still firmly planted on his face.

  “I thought I told you to lose the sunglasses,” I said in a playful tone. I didn’t actually expect him to do it, but I wasn’t going to let it pass.

  “No, can’t do that. I’ll go to dinner, but I’m keeping the sunglasses.”

  “Why?” I sighed in mock exasperation.

  “Uh,” He murmured for a few seconds, “I have an eye condition – Ocular Albinism. It makes my eyes look strange.”

  Holy shit. I hadn’t considered that it might have been a medical thing. I immediately felt awful for thinking that he’d just been a weirdo all this time when instead he’d just been worried about people seeing a strange defect and treating him differently. It was kind of sad really. If he’d just come out and said it, no one would have thought any less of him.

  “Oh,” I murmured. The wind had been taken out of sails a little bit, “I suppose that’s okay then.”

  The restaurant that Karen had chosen was actually good. I didn’t really know what to expect. I’d heard horrible things about British cuisine, but I chalked that up to the same urban myth about British dentistry. From my subtle glances around the restaurant, not only did the food seem appealing but everyone seemed to have a decent set of teeth.

  The food wasn’t anything that great, but it was okay – but that’s fine I wasn’t here just for the food. My main role tonight seemed to be acting as a translator between Karen and Aiden as the two didn’t talk directly and all conversation seemed to be filtered through me. It was exhausting. Aiden, for his part, never initiated conversation and responded curtly when a question was asked of him directly. I could see him scanning around the room periodically – almost as if he was looking for something, or expecting something, to jump out at him. He looked tense and ill at ease, but then again he always looked that way in social interactions so maybe it was nothing.

  I was actually kind of glad when dinner ended. I wouldn’t have thought it after the seven odd hour nap that I’d taken on the plane, but I was still tired and we had a big day tomorrow. I was going to be meeting the clients for the first time and beginning to arrange implementation. This was an important step, as first impressions were critical to my role as a trainer. If I bolloxed this up now, I’d have a lot of work to do to make up for it.

  * * * * * *

  I stretched as I rubbed my neck gently. It had been a hard day, but it had been well worth it. The training couldn’t have gone better, and I was feeling pretty pleased with myself. In fact, I was ecstatic. I could tell from the private smile and nod that Karen had given me during our quick catch up with management that good things had been said.

  It wasn’t uncommon to feel a little sore after a full day of training. After all, you’re standing the whole time in front of a projector screen. Today however, I felt wrecked. My neck twinged, and my lower back joined the party with a slow throb of complaint. My feet were already well and truly grumbling about the change in their usual routine. I wanted nothing more than to kick off my heels, hop into a hot shower and curl up on the couch for the remainder of the night.

  It had been a hard day. I’d basically done six hours of two three hour sessions for about twenty members of the client’s admin team, and I wasn’t used to doing training back to back like that. At work, I normally got a chance to return to my desk, sit down and answer some emails for a while. This was going to be hard work if the rest of the visit here was going to be like this.

  I hadn’t heard from Aiden yet and I had no idea what he had been doing. He’d been sequestered away into the server room all day installing the necessary infrastructure to get the software installed on their servers.

  I had no doubt that he’d be fine. He was in his element with other tech people. I had meant to check in on him throughout the day, but I never seemed to catch enough of a break to be able to do so. I had planned on seeing him during lunch, but I’d been invited to join the team for a lunch at the local pub. It would have been rude of me to refuse.

  I hadn’t been sure what the protocol was in these situations. Should I pay? Is it something that work would reimburse me for? I wished that Karen had joined us, but she was still in meetings with senior management. Apparently there was a stage two to the project that was still being worked out. Fortunately my worries about lunch had proved to be unnecessary as the manager simply paid via credit card and informed the team that it was on the company. Awesome! Free lunch!

  After my last session had finished, I found myself alone in the boardroom doing the final round of cleanup. I rubbed my lower back and re-adjusted my bra once again. The damned thing was cutting into me. I should have worn a more comfortable one. But no, I wanted to wear the fancy one for my first day here. I giggled at the thought. I didn’t know why I’d wanted to do that. It’s not like anyone was going to see it anyway, but it made me feel more sure of myself so I’m sure there was some value in that.

  All in all, I couldn’t be happier with how the day had gone. I finished up with the last lot of trainees and made my way over the temporary cubicle that they’d assigned to Karen. She beamed at me as I arrived, and together we collected Aiden from the server room, which looked like a bomb had hit it. I couldn’t tell if this was business as normal here, or if it was something that Aidan had done. I couldn’t think of any reason that he’d need to re run cables, but then again, I was simply the trainer I didn’t have to worry about the technical stuff. This was good because that whole side of the business mystified me.

  I had to remind Aiden that it was time to leave, as it didn’t look like he was even aware of the time. We trudged through the office, down the elevator and into the foyer in silence. It was funny though, the moment my feet hit the sidewalk out the front of the building I got a second wind and felt my weariness just disappear. I’d been exhausted in the elevator, but seconds later I was excited and ready for my first evening in a strange new town. Even my grumbling feet, shoulders and back didn’t seem so bad. I was ready for anything!

  “What are we doing tonight?”

  “Nothing,” Karen groaned, “I’m done for the day I think.”

  “No!” I squealed, “We should go out drinking or something! We should celebrate!”

  “So, you’ve done one day of work and you want to go out on a bender?” Karen smiled, “Ahh, to be young again.”

  “Why not? Just one drink? Then we can go be old people!” I teased.

  Karen poked her tongue out at me and made a face. “Okay,” she finally conceded, “Just one drink can’t hurt. Follow me, I know a place.”

  The place that Karen was talking about was a traditional British pub not far from the hotel. The place was packed to the rafters with people trying to unwind after a long day of work. It was everything that I’d hoped that it would be – familiar enough to be comfortable, just new enough to be exciting.

  We found ourselves a booth by a large open fire that dominated the main bar room. It was quite cozy and far enough away from the noise of the patrons and loud music that we’d be able to talk. Karen ordered the first round of drinks from the waitress. To my surprise, Aiden got a beer. I’d only ever seen him drink Mountain Dew before, but I suppose that was to be expected as he could hardly drink beer at work. I tried to remember if he’d had alcohol last night, but I couldn’t remember. Karen ordered a wine, some fancy French name, and I ordered a vodka cruiser.

  We sat in silence for a few minutes while we drank our drinks. It wasn’t awkward. There was just so much going on in the pub that kept us entertained. Besides, it was a little loud to talk.

  “Well, that it for me kids,” Karen yawned as she ran her fingers across her empty glass, “I’m not twenty-one anymore.”

  “I’m twenty-four!” I said, shaking my finger at her in mock indignation.

  “Same thing,” she chuckled, “
See you tomorrow. Don’t be hungover!”

  “Pah!” I declared loudly, “I never get hung over.”

  I’d half expected that to be the end of the night and that Aiden would pretty quickly excuse himself as well, but to my everlasting surprise that didn’t happen. He seemed quite happy just sitting there sipping his beer. It was even more amazed when he ordered another one. He seemed to have finally relaxed. Maybe he’d finally convinced himself that whatever catastrophe he had thought was going to happen wasn’t going to. That was good at least.

  “Should we order food?” he suggested unexpectedly. He hadn’t said much until now as what little conversation there had been was mostly between Karen and myself.

  “I guess,” I replied as I flipped the menu open. I quickly selected a main course and ordered another round of drinks while I was at it. I was on my third drink when my curiosity finally overcame me. I wasn’t sure if it was the alcohol or simply my sense of impropriety, but I had to know. It had been plaguing me ever since he had said it last night and I knew it was wrong to ask, but I had to know.

  “Can I, uh, see your eyes?” I whispered a little too softly as Aiden didn’t respond. Maybe he hadn’t heard me.

  I repeated myself a little louder. I knew he’d heard me this time, but he still didn’t respond. He appeared to have frozen like a deer stuck in headlights.

  “Why?” he eventually murmured.

  “Dunno,” I shrugged, “Curiosity more than anything else. You don’t have to. I’m sorry I asked.” I assured him backtracking rapidly.

  “No,” Aiden replied quickly, “It’s okay.”

  He glanced around the bar attempting to see who was around and then slid deeper into the booth so that no one would be able to see his face easily. I moved forward myself as curiosity overtook me. He ever so slowly pulled the sunglasses from his face and pushed his hair out of the way and immediately the hairs on my arm froze as goosebumps tore down my limbs. I sat breathless for a few seconds.